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THE PARTY EXPECTS YOU TO PARTY!"

LENIN

THE KREMLINAIRES MADE THEIR UK DEBUT ON NOV 6TH 2003 AT SHILLIBEERS, NORTH LONDON

 

 

 

 

The audience were advised to get there early, as stiff competition was expected to get the best seats

There was a highly successful evening of soviet swing music, exuberant dancing and serious political discussion.

The band regrets any damage caused to the venue.

 

 

 

Wholesome food was available at the gig.

On Friday 12th December the band played for a private party of decadent financiers, politicians and intellectuals at The Banqueting House in Whitehall. There was excitement and consternation among the band when former Tory leadership contender Michael Portillo seized the band's Soviet Red Flag and proceeded to wave it around the dance floor in front of his boss Michael Howard.

Order was eventually restored and the band retrieved the flag. Sadly photographic evidence of this shameful display was not obtained.

The band's next gig was at the National Theatre on London's South Bank, on January 3rd 2004:

The band regrets the following alarmist piece of black propaganda being spread by the fascist right-wing press:

NATIONAL CRISIS !

Defence chiefs held crisis talks today after it was announced that the Kremlinaires were due to appear at the National Theatre foyer on 3rd Jan, in spite of fierce opposition from police and Mi6. Thousands of bearded revolutionaries, disheveled Hampstead radicals and wild-eyed Norfolk farmers are expected to gather on the south bank, armed with pitchforks, kalashnikovs, Molotov cocktails and rolled-up copies of the New Internationalist. Whipped up to a high pitch of revolutionary fervour by madcap Marxists the Kremlinaires, they are expected to march on parliament singing the red flag, before dispersing in confusion when they realise that it is after midnight and everyone has gone home. An embarrassed Alexandra Satta, foyer events manager, admitted that booking the band had probably been a mistake- she had been duped by promises of the bands revolutionary approach to Russian Swing music, the humorous and ironic delivery, and thirteen cases of vodka delivered mysteriously to her office.

 

 

 

A spokesman for the band insisted that the performance at the National would be a purely cultural affair,with some dancing expected.

SHETLAND BURNS!

A night of rioting and unrest followed the appearance of madcap Marxists The Kremlinaires at the Shetland Folk Festival. Trouble started when, at the British Legion, the band hung their red flag next to the Queen's portrait at the back of the stage.

Feelings were inflamed, and after the band's incendiary performance outraged diehard royalists fought running street battles with Marxist converts clad in full Viking regalia and bearing axes and flaming torches. The council offices were burned to the ground following widespread arson, and calm was only restored when the rioters came upon a container load of vodka at the dockside, at which point a consensus was reached. that the Revolution could be resumed at a later date..

Russia's offer to send in peacekeeping troops, conveniently situated in Lerwick Harbour, was urgently and emphatically declined by the Foreign Office.

Shetland was relatively calm today, though trouble is expected to flare up again at the forthcoming council elections; the Communists have promised that, in return for a landslide majority, they will pledge to give Shetland independance from the United Kingdom.

It is not clear whether or not The Kremlinaires will be rebooked at the festival.

Marlborough Jazz Festival 10th July

26th August; music fans at Towersey Festival head from the campsite to see the Kremlinaires:

Jagz jazz club, Ascot, 9th October; the audience warmly applaud a guitar solo:

Canterbury Festival:11th October-, a young and enthusiastic crowd vote for an encore:

Sat 16th July 2005-Private Party

Thurs 8th September; BB's jazz club, 53, Hampton Rd, Forest Gate E.London 020 85343565

Tues 13th September 2005-Cecil Sharp House, Regents Park London

Thurs Sept 29th ; Ewarby Reading Room, Ewarby, Lincs 01529 461595

Fri Sept 30th ;Spilsby Theatre, Spilsby, Lincs 01790 752936

Sat 1st Oct ;Sturton by Stow Village Hall, Stow, Lincs 01427 788524

Sun 2nd Oct; Withern Village Hall, Alford, Lincs 01507 450148

Fri 14th Oct; Grange Hall, Radcliffe on Trent, Notts 0115 9118228

Fr1 21st Oct; Rolleston Village Hall, Newark, Notts 01636 815885

Sat 22nd Oct; Dean Hole Comm Centre, Newark, Notts 01636 636523

Sun 23rd Oct; Orston village Hall, Orston, Notts 01949 851602

Fri 11th Nov; Fulstow Village Hall near Louth, Lincs 01507 363682

Fri 18th Nov; Twyford Village Hall, Twyford. Leics 01664 840352

Sat 19th Nov; Elmesthorpe Village Hall, Leicester 01455 842197

Fri 25th Nov; Trimpley Village Hall, Bewdley, Worcs 01299 861446

Fri 2nd Dec; Areley Kings Village Hall, Wyre Forest,Worcs 01299826352

Sat 3rd Dec; Clows Top Victory Hall nr Kidderminster 01299832637

Sat 10th December, Bounds Green bowling and Tennis Club, Brownlow Road, London (swing dance club) 8.00; to book ring 020 8829 0919

Fri 6th Jan (06) N. Kesteven School, N. Hykeham Lincs 01522 883311

Fri 13th Jan ; St Luke's Church, Webheath, Worcs 01527 545521

Fri 20th Jan; Burton on the Wolds Village Hall, Leics 01509 881369

Sat 21st Jan; Long Clawson Village Hall, Leics 01664 822247

Sat 7th July (07); Forest gate Festival, Osborne Rd, Forest Gate London E7approx 3.30; free

Mon 27th August(2007) 1.00pm ; Glen Miller Festival of swing, jazz and jive;Twinwood Arena,Clapham, Beds (01234 350413)

Fri 28th September 8.30 pm; BB's, 53, Hampton Road, Forest Gate, London- free!

Fri 4th July (2008) RAF Lyneham, Wilts (private Party)

Sat 12th July (2008); Marlborough Jazz Festival

2009:

April 24th; Forest Roots at The Forest Gate Hotel, Godwin Rd, Forest Gate, London E7; 8.30. Free entry

May 9th; Broad Hinton Village Hall 8.30-10.30 Swindon Wiltshire SN4 9PS; Chris O'Neill 07775 995432May 15th; Marden House, Calne, Wilts SN11 0JJ; 7.30pm May 16th; Pound Arts Centre Pound Pill, Corsham, Wiltshire, SN13 9HX Tel/fax: 01249 701628

July 11th; Marlborough Jazz Festival

Aug 31st Glen Miller Festival of swing, jazz and jive;Twinwood Arena,Clapham, Beds (01234 350413)

Nov 14th ; The Talk, Oak Street, Norwich, 01603 622388. 8.00 till late. The Mother of all Communist Parties!

Serguei whipping up the proletariat in Lerwick

A peaceful and relaxing time is always guaranteed at a Kremlinaires performance.